EDITORIAL NOTE: I was going to merge all the posts from the first semester of the blog into its current incarnation as well, but then looked at it again and realized that for me, it’s like a page of Internetting history, akin to an electronic scrapbook. You wouldn’t trash your scrapbook and re-type a bunch of articles you had pinned in there because they would look cleaner, or re-pose and take new versions of pictures because you bought a higher-res camera. With that in mind, please follow the link below for my first 4 months of blogging…

This… is… Comedy.

Ok, so I thought I’d pop in to say that the first paper and subsequent presentation was just swell.  I don’t have to turn that mother in until I leave on Monday, so still ample time to revise and whatnot.  The second paper has actually note begun to be written yet, but a list of “things I’m going to say” has been formed and is currently being ruminated upon.  Its rough-drafting will occur this afternoon/evening/tomorrow, with its less-substantial-than-the-other-paper-just-by-its-nature revisions to occur in the ensuing three days.

So I was “browsing” a bit this morning, and I happened to visit a very nice site that I used to visit more often, but now I only stop by with the randomness of a pair of axe-wielding breasts in a comic strip.  I was looking for the copy from a sketch Steve Martin did on Saturday Night Live once, and foolish me, I shoulda known Colin would have it.  Mucho gracias.

If I had one wish that I could wish this holiday season, it would be that all the children to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace. If I had two wishes I could make this holiday season, the first would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing in the spirit of harmony and peace. And the second would be for 30 million dollars a month to be given to me, tax-free in a Swiss bank account. You know, if I had three wishes I could make this holiday season, the first, of course, would be for all the children of the world to get together and sing, the second would be for the 30 million dollars every month to me, and the third would be for encompassing power over every living being in the entire universe. And if I had four wishes that I could make this holiday season, the first would be the crap about the kids definitely, the second would be for the 30 million, the third would be for all the power, and the fourth would be to set aside one month each year to have an extended 31-day orgasm, to be brought out slowly by Rosanna Arquette and that model Paulina-somebody, I can’t think of her name. Of course my lovely wife can come too and she’s behind me one hundred percent here, I guarantee it. Wait a minute, maybe the sex thing should be the first wish, so if I made that the first wish, because it could all go boom tomorrow, then what do you got, y’know? No, no, the kids, the kids singing would be great, that would be nice. But wait a minute, who am I kidding? They’re not going to be able to get all those kids together. I mean, the logistics of the thing is impossible, more trouble than it’s worth! So — we reorganize! Here we go. First, the sex thing. We go with that. Second, the money. No, we got with the power second, then the money. And then the kids. Oh wait, oh jeez, I forgot about revenge against my enemies! Okay, I need revenge against all my enemies, they should die like pigs in hell! That would be my fourth wish. And, of course, my fifth wish would be for all the children of the world to join hands and sing together in the spirit of harmony and peace. Thank you everybody and Merry Christmas.

Aftermath, Part III

Well I did say I would do this, so here we are again, the way I think the NFL Playoffs will now break down. Devastating to my predictions over the past week were Pittsburgh’s loss at the hands of lowly Houston, San Fran’s last-second victory in Dallas, and Tennessee’s romp over Indy. Later, eh?


Happy Holidays



Well, this will be it for a while. I’ve got a lot of work to get done over the next two weeks or so, so I will bid farewell until about December 18. May all your holiday preparations proceed without incident. Since all my decorating is already done, mine will include: watching White Christmas. That’s it. Take care, hope to see you all soon, but if I don’t before the 25th, have a Merry Christmas.

Aftermath, Part II

Per last week’s message about the rest of the NFL season, here is my re-vamped playoff tree. Biggest difference is in the fate of the Eagles, who won twice sans McNabb since I wrote on this topic last. Still, I see Tampa and Oakland in the Super Bowl, with Oakland coming out on top.