9/18

Damn, the first two thirds of this month blew by really fast. Things have been busy at work, and with school starting, and everything else, so I’ve had to take the few moments that have been here or there to jot some stuff down. I’ll share them with you if you’d like…

Before I get to that, though, I want thank everyone who sent their condolences, prayers, etc, to me and my family as we cope with the passing of my Grandma Bock. One of the things that has really impressed me so far is how our entire extended family continues to lean on itself for support and strength, and of course a part of that comes from friends. So again, thank you all very much.

Some people asked me when they found out about Grandma, “Was it unexpected?” and, OK, I’ll grant you that I don’t think anybody who knew her had a lot of confidence in Grandma’s biological fortitude, particularly since her heart surgery about a year ago, but seriously: you can know things are going to happen, but that doesn’t mean you start marking off the days on the calendar or just go out for coffee after you get the news.

Maybe it’s that I was able to tell people about what had happened with a fairly even voice and in complete sentences. But here’s another thing: a person dying is not what makes you cry. A corpse doesn’t make you cry. An empty house, in and of itself, should not make you cry. It’s thinking of the times. It’s the birthdays and the Thanksgivings and the Easters. It’s the mornings watching Bob Barker and the evenings with Alex Trebec. That’s what makes you cry — the realization that the only time you’ll have one of those times again is in memory, and somewhere, it’s also realizing that memory fades a little every day.

Well I hadn’t really planned on getting into that here this morning. Maybe I’ll have more on the drudgery tomorrow.