Restroom Protocol

There are certain unwritten rules that I follow when using a public restroom, and I’d like to share them with you for debate/information…

1. Avoid eye contact with any person whose fly is open
2. Do not initiate conversation with anyone engaged in any act of human waste removal (although I may respond to someone who addresses me while I am urinating, provided that eye contact is avoided)
3. Whenever possible, maintain a 1-urinal “buffer zone” between fellow restroom occupants
4. Always use soap
5. Maintain a distance of at least 4 inches from the urinal, but do not exceed 8 inches
6. Do not, under any circumstances, engage in conversation with someone who is occupying a stall, or engage in conversation while occupying a stall

I would thank you to observe these rules any time we are in a public restroom together…

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