Internet Ads Can Go Straight to Hell

8/24

I don’t know if you know how the ads on the Internet work, but basically all the sites that sell advertising are asking your browser to eat a cookie (and unless you’ve taken specific steps to stop it from doing so, trust me: your browser is a cookie-wolfing fatass) and based on where/when/what you’re clicking or searching for, or whatever, the ads are geared toward what the cookies figure out you’re probably interested in.

This is where my browser and I have a problem.

I’m using Yahoo! now for a calendar and address book at work, and EVERY SINGLE DAY I see no fewer than six ads (in seven hours) on those pages for Yahoo! Personals. Today’s just really pushed me over the edge. It said, “She *IS* out there.”

JESUS CHRIST!!! LEAVE ME ALONE!! I’M WORKING ON IT, OK???? NOT ACTIVELY, NO, BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I’LL FIGURE IT OUT IN MY OWN TIME! JUST STOP BOTHERING ME! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS WITH THE HARASSMENT?? YOU’RE ALWAYS ALL, “WHY AREN’T YOU SEEING ANYBODY?” WHEN HAVE I *EVER* SEEN ANYBODY? WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS IS? YOU THINK THIS IS SOMETHING LIKE, WHAT? I FORGOT? LIKE I’M GONNA WAKE UP TOMORROW AND ALL OF A SUDDEN IT’LL HIT ME: “OOPS, FORGOT TO BE SEEING SOMEBODY FOR THE LAST SIX YEARS, I GUESS I’LL TAKE CARE OF THAT TODAY…” JUST LAY OFF! I ALREADY THINK ABOUT IT FOR TEN HOURS A DAY, I DON’T NEED ANY GODDAMN REMINDERS!!!

Meanwhile, it was a nice weekend which included the delivery of a kitchen table, two more chairs, a dresser, and a former microwave cart which no longer needs to hold a microwave, as well as the Kiefer’s housewarming party and Grandma’s Markowski reunion.

Saturday night, Jen and I went to see ‘Garden State,’ and we both enjoyed it quite a bit. I think it was BryGuy? that I was discussing this with: we agreed that it was impossible to NOT love Natalie Portman to pieces. Oh lordy.

Christy is coming into town today to get her car fixed. It’ll be fun to visit.

  • sigh* I really need a digital camera. Grr.

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