Did you know that in this format, it is mega-easy to read the blog on a handheld? As Dave Slotten might say ‘pretty neat, pretty neat.’

Yesterday afternoon, I had a swell time with Dave Schrubbe and Kim Vlies conducting some statistical research for one of Dave’s classes.

We took a random sampling of 43 students on the pedestrian mall between the union and the library and asked them the following questions:
1. How old are you?

2. What is your major?

3. Do you live on campus? (if ‘yes,’ which hall?)

4. Are you employed? (if ‘yes,’ full or part time, on- or off-campus?)

5. Do you want to get hit with a bat? (if ‘no,’ what if we give you a free t-shirt?)

While the data has yet to be formally sythesized, as the Chief Surveyor on this project, I can say that a startling majority of college students responded favorably to being hit with a plastic bat, and the vast majority of those who did not were still willing to be inflicted with pain in exchange for cheap gifts.

It might be fun to to conduct this survey in a variety of geographic regions, maybe try to determine if this campus has something to do with it. Dave says he would be glad to license the study to anyone interested for a nominal fee. Drop him a line if you have some spare time.

This afternoon, I’ll be heading up north for the deer hunt. It’s going to be pretty warm, according to the latest weather data; might even rain on Saturday. Thing is, though, you can never predict how cold 38 degrees is going to feel if you’re sitting still for an extended period of time.

I do like to keep at least my fingers moving, though. As you sit in a tree your mind can float in some wacky directions. Maybe that’s one of the reasons that hunters enjoy hunting as much as they do: it’s very quiet.

I could use a new space pen for the weekend, though; I remember trying to write with my regular pen last year, and it was difficult at times. A pencil would be OK, sure, if I didn’t push way too hard and break all my leads. Hence, space pen needed.

And have you ever tried writing underwater with them things? I can’t imagine what you would write on with a pen underwater, seeing as how paper isn’t going to work, and how much could you be working on while submerged that doesn’t relate directly to your submersion? One of life’s mysteries.

Wordell has a new internship at Paramount, and it affords him a lot of opportunities (Internet- and writing-wise) that I used to have when was working for Res Life. Giving that knowledge, you should drop him a line some time, too.

The holiday season is right around the corner, so make sure you check out my list if you’re frustrated or need guidance. I like December just in general; it’s probably my favorite month. In addition to the Christmas and the birthday, I only have two weeks of class that month, what with the semester winding down. I had a random dream last night, too, where people who I don’t really know very well were buying me gifts for some reason, and I felt really bad because I had nothing to offer them in return. Eh, just a dream, whatever.

Right now, there are three of us working in the Financial Aid Office. Bloody ghost town around here. I’m going to try to get out early if I can; still need to finish up a couple things at the house before I head out for the week. Catch ya once I get to E.R.

I read another article in the New York Times today about RFID-tagging for schoolchildren in Texas. ‘RFID’ stands for ‘radio frequency identification,’ and the basic principle is that you attach a tiny radio transmitter to an object that you want to keep track of, and whenever the transmitter’s signal is picked up by a receiver, you can tell where that object is. This, of course, is just one of innumerable applications of the technology, and I actually think I might’ve mentioned it before (there was another time I read something on Cnet about RFID tags for hospital patients that would carry around their medical records).

Here’s a link to the article; I hope it works. Ah, what the hell; just in case it doesn’t:
SPRING, Tex. – In front of her gated apartment complex, Courtney Payne, a 9-year-old fourth grader with dark hair pulled tightly into a ponytail, exits a yellow school bus. Moments later, her movement is observed by Alan Bragg, the local police chief, standing in a windowless control room more than a mile away.

Chief Bragg is not using video surveillance. Rather, he watches an icon on a computer screen. The icon marks the spot on a map where Courtney got off the bus, and, on a larger level, it represents the latest in the convergence of technology and student security.

Hoping to prevent the loss of a child through kidnapping or more innocent circumstances, a few schools have begun monitoring student arrivals and departures using technology similar to that used to track livestock and pallets of retail shipments.

Here in a growing middle- and working-class suburb just north of Houston, the effort is undergoing its most ambitious test. The Spring Independent School District is equipping 28,000 students with ID badges containing computer chips that are read when the students get on and off school buses. The information is fed automatically by wireless phone to the police and school administrators.

In a variation on the concept, a Phoenix school district in November is starting a project using fingerprint technology to track when and where students get on and off buses. Last year, a charter school in Buffalo began automating attendance counts with computerized ID badges – one of the earliest examples of what educators said could become a widespread trend.

At the Spring district, where no student has ever been kidnapped, the system is expected to be used for more pedestrian purposes, Chief Bragg said: to reassure frantic parents, for example, calling because their child, rather than coming home as expected, went to a friend’s house, an extracurricular activity or a Girl Scout meeting.

When the district unanimously approved the $180,000 system, neither teachers nor parents objected, said the president of the board. Rather, parents appear to be applauding. “I’m sure we’re being overprotective, but you hear about all this violence,” said Elisa Temple-Harvey?, 34, the parent of a fourth grader. “I’m not saying this will curtail it, or stop it, but at least I know she made it to campus.”

The project also is in keeping with the high-tech leanings of the district, which built its own high-speed data network and is outfitting the schools with wireless Internet access. A handful of companies have adapted the technology for use in schools.

But there are critics, including some older students and privacy groups like the American Civil Liberties Union, who argue that the system is security paranoia.

The decades-old technology, called radio frequency identification, or RFID, is growing less expensive and developing vast new capabilities. It is based on a computer chip that has a unique number programmed into it and contains a tiny antenna that sends information to a reader.

The same technology is being used by companies like Wal-Mart? to track pallets of retail items. Pet owners can have chips embedded in cats and dogs to identify them if they are lost.

In October, the Food and Drug Administration approved use of an RFID chip that could be implanted under a patient’s skin and would carry a number that linked to the patient’s medical records.

At the Spring district, the first recipients of the computerized ID badges have been the 626 students of Bammel Elementary school. That includes Felipe Mathews, a 5-year-old kindergartner, and the other 30 students who rode bus No. 38 to school on a recent morning.

Felipe, wearing a gray, hooded sweatshirt with a Spiderman logo and blue high-top tennis shoes also with a Spiderman logo, wore his yellow ID badge on a string around his neck. When he climbed on to the bus, he pressed the badge against a flat gray “reader”just inside the bus door. The reader ID beeped.

Shortly after, he was followed onto the bus by Christopher Nunez, a 9-year-old fourth grader. Christopher said it was important that students wore badges so they did not get lost. Asked what might cause someone to get lost, he said, “If they’re in second grade they might not know which street is their home.”

But on the morning Felipe and Christopher shared a seat on bus No. 38, the district experienced one of the early technology hiccups. When the bus arrived at school, the system had not worked. On the Web site that includes the log of student movements, there was no record that any of the students on the bus had arrived.

It was just one of many headaches; the system had also made double entries for some students, and got arrival times and addresses wrong for others. “It’s early glitches,” said Brian Weisinger, the head of transportation for the Spring district, adding that he expected to work out the problems.

But for the Enterprise Charter School in Buffalo, where administrators gave ID cards with the RFID technology to around 460 students last year, the computer problems lasted for many months.

The system is set up so that when students walk in the door each morning, they pass by one of two kiosks – which together cost $40,000 – designed to pick up their individual radio frequency numbers as a way of taking attendance. Initially, though, the kiosks failed to register some students, or registered ones who were not there.

Mark Walter, head of technology for the Buffalo school, said the system was working well now. But Mr. Walter cautions that the more ambitious technological efforts in Spring, particularly given the reliance on cellphones to call in the data, are “going to run in to some problems.”

In the long run, however, the biggest problem may be human error. Parents, teachers and administrators said their primary worry is getting students to remember their cards, given they often forget such basics as backpacks, lunch money and gym shoes. And then there might be mischief: students could trade their cards.

Still, administrators in Buffalo said they had been contacted by districts around the country, and from numerous other countries, interested in using something similar.

And the administrators in Buffalo and here in Spring said the technology, when perfected, would eventually be a big help. Parents at the Spring district seem to feel the same way. They speak of momentary horrors of realizing their child did not arrive home when expected.

Some older students are not so enthusiastic.

“It’s too Big Brother for me,” said Kenneth Haines, a 15-year-old ninth grader who is on the football and debate teams. “Something about the school wanting to know the exact place and time makes me feel kind of like an animal.”

Middle and high school students already wear ID badges, but they have not yet been equipped with the RFID technology. Even so, some bus drivers are apparently taking advantage of the technology’s mythical powers by telling students that they are being tracked on the bus in order to get them to behave better.

Kenneth’s opinion is echoed by organizations like the A.C.L.U. and the Electronic Frontier Foundation, a nonprofit group that promotes “digital rights.”

It is “naïve to believe all this data will only be used to track children in the extremely unlikely event of the rare kidnapping by a stranger,” said Barry Steinhardt, director of the technology and liberty program at the A.C.L.U.

Mr. Steinhardt said schools, once they had invested in the technology, could feel compelled to get a greater return on investment by putting it to other uses, like tracking where students go after school.

Advocates of the technology said they did not plan to go that far. But, they said, they do see broader possibilities, such as implanting RFID tags under the skin of children to avoid problems with lost or forgotten tags. More immediately, they said, they could see using the technology to track whether students attend individual classes.

Mr. Weisinger, the head of transportation at Spring, said that, for now, the district could not afford not to put the technology to use. Chief Bragg said the key to catching kidnappers was getting crucial information within two to four hours of a crime – information such as the last place the child was seen.

“We’ve been fortunate; we haven’t had a kidnapping,” Mr. Weisinger said. “But if it works one time finding a student who has been kidnapped, then the system has paid for itself.”

Did you *read* the line about embedding the tags sub-dermally? Oh. Em. Gee.

So my point, I guess, is that I’m afraid of becoming a blip on a digital map, and there is a part of me that’s afraid I’m there already.

In unrelated news, school is going well, it’s nice to be back (here), the Packers still lick, I have off all next week, and the New Year’s party is totally on.

How’ve you been?

9/24

I don’t know if you’ve ever been a fan of shows on the WB. Here’s the issue: rarely do the shows have anything resembling a complex storyline or a plot devoid of holes, inconsistencies, etc. I can say this because I have watched at least 50 episodes of Dawson’s Creek, every single episode of Charmed, 60+ of Smallville, and 3 episodes of Gilmour Girls. That is a fair sampling.

You don’t watch the shows on the WB for the same reason as you do average TV, or for the reason you might go to movies: the WB, you watch for the beautiful people. Oh, and the people are beautiful…

I was going to paste some pictures in here, but I still haven’t figured that out, so in the meantime:
http://www.thewb.com/charmed
http://www.thewb.com/smallville

… and now they put a new chick on Smallville who plays a young Lois Lane, and lordylordy, let me tell you. Fun stuff.

Anyway, the point is, I don’t think that the WB is really in the business of producing or airing quality television, so critics should probably get over it. The WB is eye candy, and if you’re just looking for a good time, for about 42, 44 minutes, I say indulge yourself.

9/22

I took a walk to the New Moon in order to “get out of the house” and study. One of the issues I’ve dealt with in the last few places I’ve lived is having to just about ALWAYS drive to get somewhere. This, in retrospect, was particularly true in Bozeman.

My biggest pet peeve in coffeehouses is people who can’t (or won’t) say “espresso.” For the last god damned time, it’s not EXPRESSO, it’s ESPRESSO: Eee. Ess. Pee. Rrrr. Eee. Ess. Fuckin-ess-O. Why don’t you get back in your Neon and drive off a nearby cliff?

There are all sorts of people having “important” or “significant” conversations in this place. Why is that? What elevated caffeine and tiny tables with stiff-backed chairs to such a status?

There used to be too many high school kids in here. It seemed like ALL THE TIME. Maybe that’s just the way I’ve chosen to remember it. Of course, I look around now and see a bunch of college kids, whom I’ve come to the determination are just high school kids without curfews who can get drugs and books a lot easier. But for now, they’re just feeling important, deep, or substantial because they paid two dollars for a CUP OF COFFEE.

That damned cell phone ring. That’s Raul’s ring and it’s everyone’s. Note to R: dump the Nokia, you could get something better; more unique.

She says to Nick on the phone, sounding important, ‘WE-eee are at the NewMoonCafe?, having some dessert and drinking COFF-ee.’

My thumb hurts, I’m pretty sure I sprained it on the Golden Tee machine. It’s making my writing look worse than usual since I can barely hold the pen.

One day, someone will probably look at some of my “original manuscripts,” scribbled in important coffeehouses at nine on a Wednesday, and just looking at them, thinking of all I’ve done, someone will feel important, and following the afternoon at the museum, Nick’s grandson will ask her granddaughter if she’d like to go to the coffeehouse for some Important Pie and a cup of 200-dollar coffee.

9/21

I had poetry class tonight and I realized that it will not be the end of the world.

I was admittedly apprehensive, because god knows I’ve never really written any poetry, and there are clearly a lot of people in that class (more so than in the fiction writing from last term) that fancy themselves poets, if they are not poets proper, where I didn’t get the impression that lots of people in Rindo’s thought they could write fiction.

In this way, I’m exactly the opposite of most of my mates in these two classes.

But here’s the other thing: Gemin has been right all these years, and Pam is a helluva teacher. I can see after just one full class period that she breaks everything down in a way that makes it all seem manageable, and I envy that ability. I don’t think I have it at this point.

The other thing that will not cause the world to end? The semester’s courseload. I’m not going to be overly swamped by the work I have to do in the combination of two classes, and I feel better and better each day about the schedule that I’ve made up for myself.

Y’know, there was even some good stuff @ work today: I didn’t have to sit at the front desk, so I got some work done, learned some new crap, had a staff meeting where I found out some of our understaffing problems are going to solved in the next couple weeks, and that’s definitely good.

Holy moses.

I think this is the first time I’ve felt like I had a good day this late in the semester… ever.

Huh.

Take a look in the ‘Galleries’ if you have a chance and see what I’ve done with the digital camera lately.

9/20

It never seems to fail that a bunch of the things that I have been putting off around the house get accomplished when I leave the friendly confines for a spell. Here I am at Starbucks (I’d go to the New Moon, right by my house, if not for the parking issues) and getting all my reading and blogging done. Not a bad morning.

The other thing that works perfectly is the Mondays off. Weekends, I’ve found, are tricky because so many people have off on weekends, and so much non-work-week stuff happens on weekends, it’s hard for me to concentrate on regular stuff Saturdays or Sundays. Hence the non-working, non-class-having Monday, and hells bells, it’s still brilliant.

I had initially planned to get you up to speed on a number of random musings that I’ve carried around in my pants the last few weeks the other day, but that didn’t work out. I’ll share them with you now:

1. I still need to get rid of more t-shirts. This is less of a volume problem, and more of a size issue. Facts are, that regardless of what my body looks like, I’ve finally realized that you don’t hide anything inside XL shirts, and that instead you just look like a jackass with a shirt hanging over your ass. I’ve you’re an “XL,” let me know, I’d be glad to empty out some drawers.

2. The situation where I need to get rid of the XL t-shirts has, ironically, spawned a new problem: I need to get some more “L” t-shirts.

3. If you still Can’t Believe It’s Not Butter, there’s a tub of the fat free variety in my refrigerator that I think could convince you.

4. I was shopping for a vintage Mini Cooper during the summer, and as fate would have it, I’m now driving a 1995 Buick LeSabre?. The only way I could’ve gone further in the opposite direction would be to get a Ford Expedition. The bit that surprises me even more is that I’m enjoying driving the Buick. It’s comfy, it’s got cruise, Joe helped me put the CD deck in there, and once I get a handle on parking, I will be a bona fide Buick Driver.

5. You should check out the following jazz CD (unless you’re Ben Leubner, who poo-poos all contemporary jazz): Jamie Cullum’s “Twentysomething.”

6. Don’t laugh, because it’s getting to be where it comes up time to time, and what I’m talking about here is getting closer to 30. I have a variety of stories I could tell; I think for me the reminders come up more often being around all these college kids all the time, but you begin to fight this losing battle where you no longer have all the tools and resources to being “hip,” or “with it,” and if someone asks you what the kids are into, you honestly don’t know. But as I considered the stark reality of that situation, the following things occurred to me: I don’t really give a damn what the kids are into, and it’s no big deal not being “hip” in my case, because I never was to begin with. Now, instead of being a quirky weirdo, I’m becoming an old quirky weirdo.

7. Stand-up comics have done bits about how “you go to the store and always get that cart with the broken wheel that’s always pulling to the right,” but for me, at Wal-Mart?, it is actually true. I’ve written it down. This most recent occasion marks five in row.

8. The presidential election is the American electorate what Christmas is to Catholics: even if you only vote once every four years, you fancy yourself a participant in the democratic process.

9. The last time I was in LaCrosse?, Mom and Dad and I went shopping a little on Saturday morning, and Mom observed that my wallet smells like a moldy old shoe. I had never really taken more than passing notice, but now the smell is driving me goddamn nuts.

That’s all I’ve got for you right now, enjoy the rest of your Monday, and hope for a Philadelphia victory on Monday Night. God knows I will.

9/18

Damn, the first two thirds of this month blew by really fast. Things have been busy at work, and with school starting, and everything else, so I’ve had to take the few moments that have been here or there to jot some stuff down. I’ll share them with you if you’d like…

Before I get to that, though, I want thank everyone who sent their condolences, prayers, etc, to me and my family as we cope with the passing of my Grandma Bock. One of the things that has really impressed me so far is how our entire extended family continues to lean on itself for support and strength, and of course a part of that comes from friends. So again, thank you all very much.

Some people asked me when they found out about Grandma, “Was it unexpected?” and, OK, I’ll grant you that I don’t think anybody who knew her had a lot of confidence in Grandma’s biological fortitude, particularly since her heart surgery about a year ago, but seriously: you can know things are going to happen, but that doesn’t mean you start marking off the days on the calendar or just go out for coffee after you get the news.

Maybe it’s that I was able to tell people about what had happened with a fairly even voice and in complete sentences. But here’s another thing: a person dying is not what makes you cry. A corpse doesn’t make you cry. An empty house, in and of itself, should not make you cry. It’s thinking of the times. It’s the birthdays and the Thanksgivings and the Easters. It’s the mornings watching Bob Barker and the evenings with Alex Trebec. That’s what makes you cry — the realization that the only time you’ll have one of those times again is in memory, and somewhere, it’s also realizing that memory fades a little every day.

Well I hadn’t really planned on getting into that here this morning. Maybe I’ll have more on the drudgery tomorrow.

9/1

My Grandma Bock passed away yesterday, 8/31.

For those in the know, you may remember that last fall she had a very difficult heart surgery, followed by a long stay in the hospital, some time in rehab, and only a few months ago she started living by herself again (but still relied on the helpful and loving assistance of family and friends for a lot of things).

I talked to Grandma on the phone about six days ago, and she didn’t sound that great, but she hadn’t been sounding very good for a while, I suppose. It was only about six or seven months between when Grandpa passed away and Grandma had her heart surgery. When I called last week, her machine picked up before Grandma finally grabbed the phone. She said she was in the laundry room, and had been calling for Grandpa to get the phone. She told me she was doing stuff like that a lot lately.

The funeral is tomorrow, then I’m riding back up north with Mom and Dad for the rest of the weekend. Talk to you again after.

8/24

I don’t know if you know how the ads on the Internet work, but basically all the sites that sell advertising are asking your browser to eat a cookie (and unless you’ve taken specific steps to stop it from doing so, trust me: your browser is a cookie-wolfing fatass) and based on where/when/what you’re clicking or searching for, or whatever, the ads are geared toward what the cookies figure out you’re probably interested in.

This is where my browser and I have a problem.

I’m using Yahoo! now for a calendar and address book at work, and EVERY SINGLE DAY I see no fewer than six ads (in seven hours) on those pages for Yahoo! Personals. Today’s just really pushed me over the edge. It said, “She *IS* out there.”

JESUS CHRIST!!! LEAVE ME ALONE!! I’M WORKING ON IT, OK???? NOT ACTIVELY, NO, BUT FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, I’LL FIGURE IT OUT IN MY OWN TIME! JUST STOP BOTHERING ME! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS WITH THE HARASSMENT?? YOU’RE ALWAYS ALL, “WHY AREN’T YOU SEEING ANYBODY?” WHEN HAVE I *EVER* SEEN ANYBODY? WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS IS? YOU THINK THIS IS SOMETHING LIKE, WHAT? I FORGOT? LIKE I’M GONNA WAKE UP TOMORROW AND ALL OF A SUDDEN IT’LL HIT ME: “OOPS, FORGOT TO BE SEEING SOMEBODY FOR THE LAST SIX YEARS, I GUESS I’LL TAKE CARE OF THAT TODAY…” JUST LAY OFF! I ALREADY THINK ABOUT IT FOR TEN HOURS A DAY, I DON’T NEED ANY GODDAMN REMINDERS!!!

Meanwhile, it was a nice weekend which included the delivery of a kitchen table, two more chairs, a dresser, and a former microwave cart which no longer needs to hold a microwave, as well as the Kiefer’s housewarming party and Grandma’s Markowski reunion.

Saturday night, Jen and I went to see ‘Garden State,’ and we both enjoyed it quite a bit. I think it was BryGuy? that I was discussing this with: we agreed that it was impossible to NOT love Natalie Portman to pieces. Oh lordy.

Christy is coming into town today to get her car fixed. It’ll be fun to visit.

• sigh* I really need a digital camera. Grr.

8/19

I forgot to mention something yesterday pertaining to last weekend’s shopping escapades. I want to talk about the cost of ownership of the Swiffer.

The Swiffer seems like a marvelous idea, and I’ll be the first to admit that it works just spectacularly, at least on the ‘dry’ side of things. The wet Swiffer, not really designed as a substitute for mopping, I don’t think. But yeah, dry Swiffer: it beats the crap out of sweeping, you can trust me there. The dust, it sticks to the cloth, whatever, and the thing pivots around whatever you need to get under, etc, it’s a nice cleaning tool, especially for someone like me who has 900 square feet and no carpeting.

The problem with the Swiffer is cost of ownership. You use ONE of these Swiffer pad things per ‘sweep,’ which, I mean, to keep your place looking like humans live there, you need to take care of once a week, and the “refill pack” of 16 of these things costs SEVEN AND A HALF DOLLARS.

Let’s break this down.

The initial investment of the Swiffer broom apparatus and 2 dry cloths was 9.88. 16 replacement cloths are 7.50, so that means they’re about $0.47 apiece. $0.47 * 2 = $0.94, 9.88 – 0.94 = 8.94. So the ‘broom,’ which does nothing without the cloths, is 8.94. Just to offer some perspective, you can get a sort of “home-sized” dust mop for 10 bucks. So we might as well compare there.

Over the course of a year, you need to sweep the floor at least 52 times. That means you have to spend $24.44 per year on replacement cloths for the Swiffer. Add your 8.94 for the broom, and in the first year of Swiffering you’ve spent 33.38 on stage one of floor maintenance. Or, you pony up the one-time cost of 10 bucks for the dust mop (which also has the pivoting head but which may not clean the floor as effectively over time).

OK, so let’s say you need to get a new dust mop, because this one wears out… wha’d’ya think? Every 18 months or so? Lets say 18 months for the sake of argument. And let’s say, for the sake of argument, that the Swiffer broom lasts twice as long as that. What are you looking at as a cost of floor cleaning over the next 10 years?

10 years is 120 months, and in 120 months, we’re figuring we’ll need to buy 6-and-two-thirds new dust mops, at 10 dollars apiece, plus the initial mop at 10 bucks, so that means 76.66 over that amount of time. If we’re going to assume that the Swiffer broom lasts for 36 months (or three years), then in 10 years we’d need to purchase 4-and-one-thirds new Swiffer brooms, which, at 8.94 apiece, is 47.68, plus the first one, we’re at 56.62. Of course, we can’t forget out annual Swiffer cloth cost (24.44), which, relative to the brooms themselves, is simply outrageous: 244.40 for ten years of cloths.

76.66 to dust mop for ten years, 301.02 for ten years of Swiffering. And we didn’t even bother to calculate inflation (current annual rate of inflation, by the way, is about 3.2%, so if we apply that figure annually over the next ten years, the 76.66 will actually be 79.11, and the 301.02 would be 310.66).

Clearly, if you can be satisfied with the job done by a dust mop (and it’s not that bad) you are the thriftier person to pass the Swiffer by. Had I just thought this all through while I was there in the cleaning aisle at Wal-Mart?, I could have avoided the issue altogether.